The moment you stop dreaming , your nightmares start
Friday, October 31, 2008
Sunday, October 26, 2008
How does love work?
The question discussed here has haunted human beings for millenia and has never been provided with a convincing enough response Today I would like to dig into the philosophy of the intense passion named love since I believe my hard-earned experiences and my deliberations have put me where I can have a very overall view of this human unsolved mystery . Ofcourse my individual understanding might still not be mature enough but the material presented here is to the best of my today knowledge yet may not be confirmed tommorow as I believe I still have a lot to learn.
To start with , love is created when there is a disparity of feelings , in other words the feeling of love comes into being when there exists an inequality and imbalance between the feelings of two individuals in the background of a close relationship in the sense that the one whose interest outweighs the other is the one who gets involved with this deep passion or falls in love so to speak .
Human beings generally tend to get away from those who love’em , which is quite normal for every one which makes love elussive ; you would most probably lose interest in someone who cherishes you as you view yourself in a better bargaining position than to stay in that relationship. Even if you don't end the relationship these negative thoughts start creeping into your mind.
“So why do relationships start? “One might wonder . Love is a different story and usually a secondary thing to a relationship as I don’t name the “beginning of relation ship" excitement love , it's more of testing the waters eventhough you get some of the symptoms of love such as heartbeat and so on .
Love , in the sense discussed here , is usually accompanied by a fear of loss and obsession and could therefore only happen when a relationship has started , no matter in what quality of course . Thus , people are first drawn to each other because of certain qualities but then come to fall in love if they don’t feel loved enough. This is starting a losing battle . However , there are times when this imbalance is reversed in favor of the previously loving partner as a result of some incidents which could lead to an emotional loss on the part of the new lover , I mean sometimes being loved lures you to fall in love and then your partner might all of a sudden lose interest in you as you have become an easily accessible and seemingly worthless pathetic lover.
In this sense it’s impossible for two people to be both truly in love , of course save for exceptionally rare circumstances which will be disciussed later , because the one in love is in fact the UNLOVED partner. Most people are incapable of withstanding love as once you are loved you start thinking of yourself as better than the one who loves you . This could distance you from this relationship because you are given the impression that your potentials are too good for your partner.
If this rule applies to every human being then it would be impossible for anyone to be loved back. Yet it shouldn’t be true which is all because there are people who have rached a level in understanding where they appreciate love.
Love needs a certain degree of perfection which most people are devoid of ; Only few people get to the point where they understand how precious love is and how great is a person who can forget himself and be in love . A person with this understanding starts loving back rather than get away from love if he's ever lucky enough to have the mentioned imbalance in his/her favor .
To start with , love is created when there is a disparity of feelings , in other words the feeling of love comes into being when there exists an inequality and imbalance between the feelings of two individuals in the background of a close relationship in the sense that the one whose interest outweighs the other is the one who gets involved with this deep passion or falls in love so to speak .
Human beings generally tend to get away from those who love’em , which is quite normal for every one which makes love elussive ; you would most probably lose interest in someone who cherishes you as you view yourself in a better bargaining position than to stay in that relationship. Even if you don't end the relationship these negative thoughts start creeping into your mind.
“So why do relationships start? “One might wonder . Love is a different story and usually a secondary thing to a relationship as I don’t name the “beginning of relation ship" excitement love , it's more of testing the waters eventhough you get some of the symptoms of love such as heartbeat and so on .
Love , in the sense discussed here , is usually accompanied by a fear of loss and obsession and could therefore only happen when a relationship has started , no matter in what quality of course . Thus , people are first drawn to each other because of certain qualities but then come to fall in love if they don’t feel loved enough. This is starting a losing battle . However , there are times when this imbalance is reversed in favor of the previously loving partner as a result of some incidents which could lead to an emotional loss on the part of the new lover , I mean sometimes being loved lures you to fall in love and then your partner might all of a sudden lose interest in you as you have become an easily accessible and seemingly worthless pathetic lover.
In this sense it’s impossible for two people to be both truly in love , of course save for exceptionally rare circumstances which will be disciussed later , because the one in love is in fact the UNLOVED partner. Most people are incapable of withstanding love as once you are loved you start thinking of yourself as better than the one who loves you . This could distance you from this relationship because you are given the impression that your potentials are too good for your partner.
If this rule applies to every human being then it would be impossible for anyone to be loved back. Yet it shouldn’t be true which is all because there are people who have rached a level in understanding where they appreciate love.
Love needs a certain degree of perfection which most people are devoid of ; Only few people get to the point where they understand how precious love is and how great is a person who can forget himself and be in love . A person with this understanding starts loving back rather than get away from love if he's ever lucky enough to have the mentioned imbalance in his/her favor .
Saturday, October 25, 2008
Dating
These days I have turned into a known dating counselor both at university and among my friends to such an extent that I will be the first , people would choose to go to if anything goes wrong in their relationship or they suddenly find themselves in love with some one . All it takes is a talk and they normally have their loved ones beside them.
Throughout this time I have come to the conclusion that what I used to consider common knowledge is for most people very difficult to understand for instance most people still have problems identifying interest of others in themselves or feel uncertain about how a smile , for example , should be interpreted , thus I will share my unbiased insights into how relationships work here on my internet page so that more and more people can manage successful relationships. I will be glad if you consider me trustworthy enough and confide your problems in me and I will do my best to show you the right path.
However , I have to admit that earning this knowledge has cost me many good relationships and I , like anyone else have had very unsuccessful relationships too , but now my knowledge is ripe enough to be practically applied to a relationship .
You'll hear soon on how you can make others love you.
Nima
Throughout this time I have come to the conclusion that what I used to consider common knowledge is for most people very difficult to understand for instance most people still have problems identifying interest of others in themselves or feel uncertain about how a smile , for example , should be interpreted , thus I will share my unbiased insights into how relationships work here on my internet page so that more and more people can manage successful relationships. I will be glad if you consider me trustworthy enough and confide your problems in me and I will do my best to show you the right path.
However , I have to admit that earning this knowledge has cost me many good relationships and I , like anyone else have had very unsuccessful relationships too , but now my knowledge is ripe enough to be practically applied to a relationship .
You'll hear soon on how you can make others love you.
Nima
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