My childhood

My childhood did not get off to what I would call a magnificent start , or to be fair I don’t have many good memories of the first ten year of my life , after it , though , things lightened up and life came close to the way I now view it save for my today’s image for others , then I was good only when I looked at my life through my own little simplistic brown eyes , which was a great thing knowing that many people in their adulthood would not still taste self satisfaction the way I did then. I was very lazy with my lessons I mean I never did my homework in primary school . I have a clear impression of my mom staying nights awake doing my homework , neither was I a good student, my teachers were always punishing me and I still did not care . I myself never thought I was intelligent actually I thought the opposite and so did everyone else in my family , they never thought my intellectual capacity would allow me to continue my education .In the context of my family , in the extended sense , I was disrespected , taken for a fool and no better than mediocre. I always wondered how it was possible for my cute friends then to attract that much attention and be so much loved. the thing I love about this period was my very kind heart , I don’t remember a moment that I had the slightest amount of jealousy , I loved every one to an extent that it would be misused , mainly by my older brother . If he ever wanted anything in which I could be of any use , in particular if he needed a partner to play with , by the way I hated playing , he came to me and threatened he would hurt himself , often by putting his finger in the fan , if I wasn’t obedient . I never turned him down unable to imagine my brother’s finger hurt. I think I still have a dose of that good nature in me. In contrast with this dully uneventful and bitterly upsetting ten years , the second decade of my existence was marvelously pleasant . I learnt ,in this period , how I could savor the moment at the same time as standing out , How to never take things too seriously and still be amongst the best . I was never the very best , even then , in school but I was confident I could be , because I was not using a tenth of my resources. Seeing my friends pushing themselves to the limit and not scoring significantly better than the “ careless happy go lucky me” gave me a sense of self-worth. I was suddenly liked by people around me and I particularly enjoyed this new found popularity. When I was sitting on our school benches in my classes , there was always a fight between the two others to sit beside me that was why I always sat in the middle. I became very religious , funny was it that I sometimes thought I was the “ mahdi “ known as the time Imam and I wondered why my parents hadn’t named me appropriately . as I found more about life and its realities and people around me I distanced myself from religion little by little.